It was probably close to 10 years ago that I had this idea I shared with my sister, who was living in Hollywood, California at the time, that perhaps a sitcom situated at a private golf club wouldn’t be a bad idea. She guffawed at the idea at first but then I gave her a couple of quick “how about this” type stories….and she quickly jumped on board. It became a family affair – I gave the stories – 99% of them based on complete fact – my Mom typed up the pilot episode, and, my sister, Kari, would weasel her way in and out of the scum that is Hollywood.

The end result? It allegedly made it’s way onto the desk of someone who worked for someone who supplied someone at FOX with ideas for pilot sitcoms. It stopped there. The feedback was FOX wanted more “ethnicity” in the characters, even suggesting more Hispanics as, at the time, their audience had a very hispanic flavour. Well, I wasn’t motivated enough to actually make this stuff up so…there it sits, on my hard drive…precious memories.

Since that original 10 episode season I’ve have come up with at least 40 more episodes. Titles of the episodes have included:

“My Guest’s Name is Earl”,
“I Need a Cart…Doctors Orders”,
“What Do You Mean My Cart Has No Roof? I’m Allergic to the Sun”
“I Dream of Jeans….in the Dining Room”
“Jack Frost is Screwing Up My Lunch at IKEA”
“The Hunt for Handfuls of Tee’s in October”

And, I just added a new one….it’s the title of this blog entry.

I could technically have a whole season “direct to DVD” on the subject of tees. Tees are a necessity in the game of golf – you need them. And, because you need them – it’s likely you have an opinion on the colour, type, length and durability. The new ECO tees in the shop have spurned the normal conversation….too long, too white, too flexible, too plastic, they’ll hurt the mowers, they’re not eco friendly, the teeing ground is too firm, what happens if I only want to hit an iron shot?? At least the ones before would break so I could use a broken one. It’s the normal sort of banter we get to hear and the sort of conversation that makes you wonder why there aren’t any government funded sociological studies of human behaviour in pro shops.

The facts on the tees: They are white, very white. They cost 2.5 times as much as the previous selection of tees. They are very eco friendly and are biodegradable. They are not bad for the green mowers, in fact, 4 out of 5 dentists recommend these tees to prevent tartar build up in TORO machines. They do bend. The fact that they bend allows you to “bend” them back into shape. They are more durable provided the user picks them up off the ground after they have hit their tee shot. Being ECO friendly with ECO tees means taking and using, only what you need which is why the tees are being held hostage (against their will) behind the pro shop counter.

I’ve used the tees and they do bend a little…too much? Hard to say. I’m starting to think it’s more of a “feel” issue myself, that I’ll actually get used to the feel of pushing this new tee into the ground and the feeling will, in fact, become normal, and, thus, not be an issue.

My next idea is to write a sitcom based on a golf pro who decided to write a sitcom based on the day to day stories that occur at a private golf club only to have the sitcom rejected, but, then he gets to write a blog where he can tell everyone his idea for the sitcom and a reader then steals the idea and sells the pilot to a major network only to have the golf pro come back and use his blog entry as evidence in a court case to prove that the sitcom was actually his idea.

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 5th, 2010 at 3:10 am and is filed under Rideau View. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.